“It means nothing about me and everything about that man.”

To a crowded auditorium on the Southwest Mississippi Community College campus, Matthew Sandusky shared his story in hopes of empowering other victims of child sexual abuse and starting a national conversation about the issue.

Sandusky is the adopted son of former Penn State Coach Jerry Sandusky, who was sentenced to 60 years in prison for the child sexual abuse of Matthew and several other children.

Sandusky shared during his story how abuse reigned in his life even before he met “his perpetrator” – he never used the former coach’s name. He shared how the men in his immediate family, from his grandfather to his biological father to his uncles, abused the children and women in his family. He talked about the cycle that this sets in motion where a life of being abused leads to that child possibly becoming an abuser themselves.

While telling his story, Sandusky used his platform to point out different avenues and ways that child abuse could be prevented or, possibly even, stopped.

“We need to teach children they are in control of their own bodies,” Sandusky said. “We need to teach children to voice that.”

He and his wife, Kim, have five children of their own and Sandusky talked about how even their 2 and a half-year old knows the correct terms which he cited as important if a child has to report any abuse.

While acknowledging that many people experience abuse different ways, Sandusky continued to paint a picture of a possible perpetrator or someone who could be of suspicion. He stated that abusers look like everyday people and are people we may come in contact with everyday. Like many other advocates knowledgeable about child abuse, Sandusky shared the statistic that 90 percent of all sexual abuse is committed by someone that the child knows.

“You have to think about those who want to spend more time with your children than you do,” Sandusky said followed by an explanation of his statement saying that abusers work by pulling the child close to them and away from everyone else in their life and provided an example from his own lived experiences.

“We all need to watch out for children, no matter whose children they are,” Sandusky said and stated that everyone should have the courage to protect the child and to take action if you suspect anything.

Prior to his speaking engagement that night, Sandusky spoke to high school students in the Pike County area and told the mostly adult audience in the auditorium about the importance of society having a conversation about sexual child abuse. He said while some say such conversations are hard and uncomfortable he challenged listeners to realize that these children could be victims, perpetrators and go on to be parents.

“Have that hard conversation, let them know they can come to us. We can start to empower them and they can teach their children,” Sandusky said.

He directed those in the audience to go out into their communities and homes, talk to neighbors, children and coworkers and have a conversation about child abuse.

“Not a hush, hush conversation,” Sandusky said. “If you’re ashamed about it how do you expect those affected to not feel ashamed?”

Sandusky, a victim himself, made sure he didn’t leave out messages for victims who would hear his story – whether in the audience or secondhand.

“Each time I get to stand up, it’s empowering to me. Get it outside yourself,” Sandusky said about sharing the trauma of abuse. “Whatever feeling you feel about yourself, put it out of yourself. Healing is a continual process. What happened to you does not determine the future you could have.”

Sandusky said that by standing in front of audiences he hopes, in some way, he’s paying it forward. He went on to make a promise to use his voice “to create change, protect children and help survivors understand that you are not alone, you are worthy of healing and you are loved.”

The event was hosted by the Southwest Mississippi Children’s Advocacy Center. Both advocates from the center and Sandusky encouraged attendees and all others to research sexual child abuse, learn about how it happens and how to work against it.